Small Town Crime Logs: Lone Star State Edition

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Small Town Crime Logs3/2 Cedar Point 5:26 p.m. – Police received multiple calls concerning a convenience store employee slapping customers with a hot mop.

3/4 Allentown 9:52 p.m. – A woman called police to report someone posting inappropriate things about Elvis Presley on social media.

3/7 Fort Garrison 3:44 p.m. – A woman dialed 911 to report someone entered her apartment and stole a hair dryer, a cell phone charger, baby wipes and a 2 liter bottle of A&W root beer.

3/10 Cactus Cove 11:02 a.m. – A man called police to report a lost baby kitten. According to the caller, the kitten has a swastika painted on its forehead.

3/11 Irving Meadows 1:55 p.m. – An anonymous caller informed police that a man wearing a dress at the dog park was doing cartwheels and exposing himself.

3/11 Bellville Springs 6:57 p.m. – A male bicyclist called police to report being struck by a jug of urine on the highway. The caller was too distraught to remember the truck’s description or license plate information.

3/14 Oyster Bay 8:01 a.m. – An elementary school teacher called 911 to report three of her students were being chased by an elderly woman with an axe.

3/15 Crandell 10:36 p.m. – Police responded to a report of an intoxicated male urinating off the main street bridge. The suspect was described as a “hipster with a man bun.”


3/16 Headly 2:11 p.m – The sheriff’s department responded to a report of a porta potty floating down the Colorado River.

3/18 Mission City 3:10 p.m. – A Walmart customer called police to report an adult male cutting the heads off stuffed animals with a knife.

3/20 Sugarville 9:24 p.m. – A man called police to report someone has been stealing cigarette butts from his garage. The caller believes someone is trying to frame him for a crime.

3/21 Sterling Heights 4:32 p.m. – A McDonald’s customer called police to report someone had defecated in the children’s playland area. The customer believes the suspect is an adult because of the size of the feces.

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